#FoodFails : Proof The Human Race Isn’t All That Domesticated (or Clever)

Posted: 09/06/2013 in Blog, Humour, Social Media, Twitter
Tags: , , ,

So this evening on Twitter, #FoodFails was in amongst the top trends of the day. Upon seeing this trend one might think of the odd failed recipe or freakish kitchen mishap, of which there were many, but there were also contributions from people that if it were not an involuntary bodily function they would most certainly forget to breathe.

Now I’m no all-star chef or food expert, but I can fend for myself pretty well in the kitchen. Some of these people, however, if left alone with no readily edible food and not within walking distance of a fast-food outlet would fairly rapidly die out. Natural Selection at it’s best I suppose…

Despite having the ability to read, which if used would have helped avoid this mishap, if this person is not clever enough to read labelling on bottles then maybe a mouthful of glue to ensure they don’t speak for a while might not be a bad thing.

Because no matter how many times they are told otherwise, there’s always one person who thinks it’s a clever idea to put something made of metal into the microwave… *facepalm*

It takes a really, really special sort of person to manage this one. There aren’t even words for it. Is it even possible?!

Microwavable food comes with reasonably strict and simple instructions on the box to ensure these types of things don’t happen. It’s a supposedly fool-proof type of food to ensure the simplest of humans manage to survive day-to-day. If you manage to screw that up you might wanna just forget about the future in general…

So, who wants to tell this person that a sausage IS actually stuffed pig intestine, or shall I? It’s common knowledge, right?!

Clearly this pizza box stated “Cook until friends arrive” in the instructions section…

You’d think that when serving food that needs to be cooked, you would cook it. Food 101: FAILED.

Special places on Idiocy Avenue are reserved for those who mistake other vegetables for chilli peppers. If you somehow manage that, you deserve the searing hot pain.

Not content with not being able to make super noodles (SUPER NOODLES?!!), this person had to take it just that bit further and throw a big f*ck you in the face of basic mathematics.

If kitchens could take out restraining orders, this lot and more like them need to served one very quickly before somebody or themselves ends up seriously hurt.


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